TROTD - Chapter Seven: Woman Sawed In Half

Olivia squinted in the sunlight streaming through the open blinds. She slowly slid away from Fitz and pulled on his discarded shirt from the night before. She found her clutch in the living room and checked to find she had three messages. The first was a drunken message of thanks from Abby. The second was from her manager reminding her of her Monday meetings. The third, her mother checking in with her since they hadn’t spoken in several days. She erased the first two messages, saving the third, and made her way back upstairs. Fitz was sleeping in nearly the same position as when she left, sprawled on his back, barely covered by a sheet, his head still turned towards where she had been laying. Olivia grinned to herself then padded into the bathroom and turned on the shower. She had just slipped under the hot stream when she heard the bathroom door open.

“Were you just going to leave?” he asked stepping into the shower behind her.

“No” she smiled and kissed him lightly on the cheek, “I have to meet my Mom to go to church. I need to go home and change.”

“So, you were going to leave me a note?” he took the body wash from her and began washing her slowly.

“I was going to wake you before I left” she assured with another kiss, “I’m just still not sure how this all works.”

“How what works?” he continued to move the washcloth over her.

“This….us” she motioned between them, “I don’t even know what to call it. Normally I would ask you to go to church with me, meet my Mom, but you have this weird situation…”

“It won’t be like this forever, Livvie” he touched her cheek, “Like I explained to you before, I purposely attended every event by myself or with a different woman so it was never construed as me dating someone.  I’m in uncharted territory here. I want things to be different with you but it’s going to take time.”

“Your kids are grown up” she turned into the stream of water under the guise of rinsing herself with the added benefit of hiding her concern, “They have to know about this and won’t it be so much worse when the truth about us comes out?”

“Ellie and Heather know that Megan and I aren’t together” Fitz admitted running his hands up and down her back, “They have their own lives and they keep up the charade for appearances. They love their mother and they love me. Over Christmas Megan and I will talk to them and I’ll tell them I met someone....I’ll tell them I met you.”

            She heard him speak the words but she wasn’t sure whether she could believe him. Their entire relationship had been a whirlwind but in the harsh light of day Olivia’s sensibilities returned. She was raised to believe that hard work and intelligence were the ways to get ahead. She had graduated summa cum laude with dual bachelor’s degree in three years then completed her masters with highest honors.  She had a level head on her shoulders, most of the time. Unfortunately, her head seemed to leave her when she and Fitz were together.  They needed to make a plan, she could stick to a plan, they needed a united front if they had any hope of continuing their relationship without being discovered.

“Livvie, are you okay?” he asked trying to stir her from her contemplations. She smiled and kissed his lips fully before turning off the water. She shivered when she stepped from the shower. Fitz wrapped her towel around her and held her against him. He kissed her hair then let his fingers trail down her neck. She blushed when his fingers stopped on the love bites.

“How are you going to explain these to your Mom?” the grin on his lips was both wicked and apologetic.

“Makeup” she replied beginning to pat her skin dry, “or maybe I’ll just tell her that I’m having a torrid affair with a married man?”

            A chuckle escaped him before he could stop it, “You are so very different than your public persona aren’t you?”

“What is that supposed to mean?” she asked with a coy grin.

“We all thought you were this spoiled, brainiac princess who thought you were above everyone else” he began. Then seeing the shock on her face, he rushed to continue, “but you’re not. You’re gorgeous and so smart. You’re funny and selfless. You’re one of the few young actresses who actually have it in them to have their own show.”

            She was quickly dressing, facing away from him, but he could see the back of her neck and watched it begin to pink. He hadn’t meant to make a declaration then but it was something she needed to hear. He walked up behind her when she pulled her wrinkled dress over her hips.

“Olivia, don’t wear that dress home, let me give you something,” he kissed her neck lightly, “I’ll find you something to wear.”

“Fitz, it’s not a big deal,” she stood up a little straighter, “I don’t need you saving me, fixing things for me, I can do things by myself.”

“That wasn’t what I meant,” he sounded wounded, “If you wear that dress home it seems –“

“Seems what?” she was standing in her bra with her dress only half pulled on, “Seems like this is a secret, an affair? Like we don’t want people to know?”

“Go ahead and tell them” he ran his hands through his hair.

“We can’t” she sighed still not pulling her dress any further on.

“Then what do you want me to do Livie?” his voice was pleading and his eyes looked lost, “You tell me what you want to do and how you want to do it and we’ll make it happen.”

“I don’t know what I want” she whispered then stepped tentatively closer to him, “I know that I like this, what we’re doing. I know I don’t want to get a bad reputation for sleeping with my leading men. I know my parents would be so disappointed if they knew I was even entertaining being involved with someone who is married. I know I’m disappointed in myself.”

“This isn’t on you, Olivia” he took her hands in his, “We made this choice, we both made this choice. If it’s too hard we can stop, I’ll quit the show if you want. Megan and I are separated and we’re getting divorced but I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

“That’s not what I want” she moved to his dresser and began opening drawers. He watched her, amused, from the bed. She didn’t miss a beat as she spoke, “I want to make this work but it can’t cost me my reputation and it can’t cost me the show.”

            She settled on a t-shirt that was ridiculously big on her and a pair of warm-up pants. He laughed when she pulled up the pants. She looked like a child wearing their father’s clothes.

“What?” she wrinkled her nose at him.

“You,” he pulled her closer to him by the waistband of the pants, “This disguise is genius. No one would ever guess you’re a big TV diva in this getup.” He ran his fingers around the inside of the waistband.

“Fitz, I have to go” she laid her palm on the center of his chest.

“I know, but we’re going to come up with a plan” he tilted her chin towards him, “I know this is something and I know the stakes are high. We’re going to figure it out. Why don’t you let me take you to lunch after church? Your Mom can come too.”  He winked as he finished his last statement.

“I’ll call you later” she slipped on her heels bringing her close enough to reach his lips then kissed him. It was intended to be short but quickly deepened. She needed the kiss to last her until she saw him again and he needed the resolve to talk to Megan.

“We better get you home before I change my mind about letting you go” he kissed her cheek then took her hand, “I’ll have your dress cleaned. And bring some things the next time you come over.  It will be nice to have reminders of you around.”

“What about when your wife visits?” she smiled. He opened the car door for her then walked around to climb behind the wheel.

“She doesn’t stay here when she’s in town” he replied matter of factly. He was well aware that she was attempting to build a wall between them.

“And your daughters?” she smiled sweetly over at him.

“I see the public persona of Olivia Pope has arrived,” he touched his hand to her thigh and grinned, “Always pushing everyone.  Well, Livie” he used her nickname as a reminder that he knew the softer, more playful version of Olivia, “my daughters do spend significant time in my home but I think having some of your clothes and toiletries around wouldn’t shock them too badly.”  She smirked, she’d met her match. He observed her reaction then continued, “just don’t leave those cute little thongs in the couch cushions.”

            She laughed and rolled her eyes, when he said things like that it was easy to see how Fitz had gotten his reputation. It amused her that Fitz talked about her private and public personas when he was equally guilty of portraying dual personalities. Fitz was the typical Hollywood playboy by day, fast car, perfectly dressed, devastatingly handsome. Women lusted after him wherever he went. But when they were alone he was sweet and caring, smart and funny, still devastatingly handsome. When he was with her she didn’t get the impression he felt the need to be perfect, he seemed more at ease. They were both more at ease when they were together.

X-X

“Olivia” her mother sang as Olivia stepped from her car. She had managed to change her clothes, fix her hair, and still make it to church with fifteen minutes to spare. She hoped she didn’t look as hurried as she felt.

“Hi Mama” Olivia beamed embracing her mother.

“I’ve missed you Sweetheart, you haven’t been returning my calls” Victoria sounded worried.

“Sorry, I’ve just been busy with the show and trying to get out and socialize” Olivia linked arms with her mother and they walked into the church.

“Have you met someone?” he mother eyed her carefully, “I hope he’s not an actor.”

“Mama, I’ve just been going out with Abby and people from work” Olivia didn’t want to lie to her mother. She felt her answer was enough to appease her but vague enough to not be a total falsehood.

“I’m glad you’re meeting people and enjoying yourself” her mother smiled, “Just be careful. I worry about you.”

            Olivia thought about reminding her mother that she wasn’t a little kid anymore but thought better of it. There was no winning this argument with her mother. To her she would always be her baby girl, no number of leading roles would change that.  Instead she changed the subject.

“Remember, my house for Christmas dinner”

“Your father and I are looking forward to it” Victoria patted her arm. Olivia slipped off her coat, her blouse sliding to the side briefly exposing the now deep purple mark on her collarbone. Victoria glanced at her daughter but Olivia didn’t notice.

X-X

“Hi Meg” Fitz said stiffly into the phone.

“Hi Fitz” her reply sounded slightly cautious, “I’m surprised you’re calling me. Is something wrong? Is it something with the girls? Your parents?”

“No, nothing like that” Fitz assured though he sounded no calmer, “I think we need to talk.”

“About her?” Megan asked with an increasingly chilly tone.

“No, not about Olivia, about us” Fitz corrected, “Our arrangement is really making things complicated.” He began nervously playing with the hem of his shirt then he pulled the collar to his face, taking a large inhale. When he returned home he had put on the shirt he’d worn the night before wanting to feel like Olivia was close to him when he spoke with Megan. He wasn’t sure how she managed to make everything she touched smell like her but he certainly wasn’t complaining. He smiled at the memory of their night together, steeling his resolve to continue.

“Complicated for you and Olivia?” Megan asked the obvious question.

“Just complicated,” he was beginning to become exasperated with Megan. Though their relationship was far from traditional he never disliked Megan, they had simply grown apart, grown into two different people who existed in two different worlds. But today she was beginning to try his patience, “I think we should talk to the girls during our dinner in New York over the holiday. I want them to know about Olivia and I before there’s a chance for anything to come out in the press.”

“What about your father? What do you think he’ll say?” Megan’s voice was quiet and he knew it hurt her when he talked about Olivia, “And why her Fitz?”

“Megan…” Fitz felt like an ass. How did he tell his wife that he had feelings for another woman? He didn’t question his desire to be with Olivia but Megan was the mother of his children. He knew he owed her an explanation, “I don’t know why Olivia. I mean I know why but I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Is it because she’s young? Pretty? Is she good for your career? What is it Fitz?” he thought she sounded like she would cry and a wave of nausea came over him.

“We didn’t intend it to happen, certainly,” he began carefully, “We met on the set and there was just chemistry between us. We clicked. She’s beautiful and smart and funny. I don’t care that she’s young and a relationship with her is probably the worst thing for my career but it just feels right.”

            His response was met with silence at first. He wondered if she had hung up but then he could hear her breathing.

“Do you love her?” Megan whispered, not wanting to know the answer but needing to know.

“I don’t know” he had thought about that question himself over the past few days, “I don’t think we’ve been together long enough to really fall in love, but I know I could.”

            Again his answer was met with quiet.

“Then we’ll tell the girls at Christmas” now he knew that she was crying.

“Don’t cry Meg, we knew this day was going to come” he soothed, “The girls will understand…and I really am sorry. We’ll make sure everything works out for the best for everyone.”

            The phone call ended soon after and Fitz let out a huge sigh. The cleaning company had removed the last traces of the party and he was alone again. He sat on the couch and put his bare feet up on the coffee table. He smiled to himself wondering if that would bother Olivia. Suddenly his house felt empty and he wanted to hear her voice and hold her hand and sit with her. He sighed again and turned on the television, finding a football game to watch.  He went to the refrigerator and started to reach for a beer then thought better of it and took a bottle of wine from the wine fridge instead.

            He checked his phone, it was nearly three in the afternoon and he hadn’t heard from Olivia. He wondered if she had forgotten about him or changed her mind about wanting to continue a relationship with him. He quickly admonished himself for letting the thought cross his mind. No woman had ever made him second guess himself like she did.

X-X

            Olivia and her mother sipped tea and talked after finishing their lunch. Victoria really was her best friend. They talked about everything and her mother had always helped her when she had to make a difficult decision. It hurt Olivia to think she couldn’t talk to her mom about Fitz but she hoped the time would come soon that she could introduce them. She hoped her parents would like Fitz.

            Olivia pulled her phone from her purse to check the time. She had promised to call Fitz but hadn’t had the opportunity to be alone to do so. It was 3:15 and she didn’t see her conversation with her mother ending anytime soon so she sent Fitz a text.

Enjoying my visit with Mom. Can I see you tonight? Livvie

            Victoria took a long sip of her tea. Olivia could tell she had wanted to say something all afternoon. 

“Olivia, I noticed something when you took your coat off in church” Victoria’s voice was slightly coarse.

“Mom?” Olivia didn’t comprehend.

“On your neck Olivia” her mother gestured toward the collar of her blouse. Olivia began to ask again what her mother was talking about then the realization hit her.

“Mom –“

“I know you’re an adult and I know I’m not supposed to ask but it concerns me when I see things like that and you tell me you’re not dating anyone” Olivia was in hell.

“Oh that” she tried to shrug it off, “I know it looks bad but I was getting my Christmas decorations out and something fell out of one of the boxes and hit my shoulder.”

“I see” her mother eyed her skeptically.  Olivia knew she didn’t believe her but was kind enough to let the subject drop. She looked down at her phone again hoping for a message from Fitz.

I miss you Gorgeous. Wouldn’t miss the chance to see you. Come over any time.

            Victoria saw a giddy smile reach Olivia’s lips as she looked at her phone. She considered asking about whatever was making her smile but thought better of it. There must be some reason Olivia didn’t want to talk about it. She knew when the time was right her daughter would talk to her. Olivia quickly texted Fitz back

Meet me at my house. 6477 Zuma View Place. 5:00. I’ll cook you dinner.

“Mom, I have to get home” Olivia said tucking her phone back into her purse, “We start our big press tour for the show tomorrow and I have meetings all afternoon for the charity.”

“Sure, you need your rest” Victoria knew Olivia was going to meet her mystery man but she didn’t press her for information. They rose from the table and both pulled on their coats, “be careful, Olivia” she said hugging her daughter tight, “I love you.”

“I love you too Mama”

X-X

            Fitz was anxious as he drove to Olivia’s condo. He loved having her in his house and felt like she fit so well there but this would be totally different. He felt like Olivia inviting him to her place seemed like a big step. He would get to see her world and that meant so much to him. He followed his GPS until he pulled into a short driveway in front of an immaculate Mediterranean townhouse. He opened the trunk to retrieve the bag he had brought then thought better of it and replaced it. He chuckled to himself considering how nervous he was then opened the passenger door to remove the flowers and gift he’d brought. He approached the door and rang the doorbell. Two deep breaths later Olivia opened the door looking more gorgeous than he remembered.

“Hi” she smiled. She was wearing skinny jeans that fit her perfectly and a cream colored sweater that hung off one shoulder. Her feet were bare and he noticed her freshly manicured toes. He couldn’t think of a single thing that wasn’t perfect about her.

“Hi” he stepped into the entryway, “You look stunning.”

            She blushed and looked down at her clothing, “It’s just jeans and a sweater” her voice sounded sweet, demure.

“Gorgeous” he bent to kiss her cheek then handed her the flowers he was holding, “These are for you.”

“You know calla lilies are my favorite” she took the bouquet with a smile and walked towards the kitchen. He followed behind her looking around as they walked. She filled a vase with water and trimmed the stems of the lilies before arranging them. He watched her work from one of the kitchen stools.

“I like your place” he touched her hand, “It is very Olivia Pope.”

“But is it the public Olivia or the private Olivia?” she mocked lacing her fingers with his.

“I think this is very ‘my Olivia’” he gave her a crooked grin then looked down at their hands knitted together.

“Your Olivia?” the moniker both flattered her and scared her slightly.

“Is that okay?” he asked tentatively pulling her into his arms, “That I call you mine?”

            She pulled away from him just a bit so she could look in eyes, “I’d like that but let’s go slow.”

“Whatever my Olivia wants” he teased placing a kiss on the tip of her nose, “Does the ‘take it slow’ plan include a tour of your place?”

“Of course” she took his hand and led him through the house. When they finished the tour she led him out to the backyard. It was perfectly manicured, secluded with the most exceptional landscaping and in one corner there was an in-ground spa.

“I was thinking dinner out here” she suggested, “I’m cooking grilled chicken with mango-habanero salsa.”

“Sounds absolutely perfect” he looped his fingers through her belt loops and inched her closer to him. His hands moved to her cheeks and she knew what would come next. When their lips met everything was right again. He kissed her, letting all the passion he felt fall from him into her. He thought about what Megan had asked him earlier about being in love with Olivia. Was that what all these feelings were colliding inside him? He wasn’t sure but he knew it was something, something he didn’t want to lose.

X-X

            After dinner they sat on the couch drinking wine and talking about work and Fitz’s restaurant. The grand opening was the following weekend and he invited Olivia to attend suggesting she bring her parents. She accepted since it would likely be the last time she saw Fitz before he headed back to New York for his family Christmas celebration.

            Olivia put her head on Fitz’s shoulder. She didn’t want to think about spending time away from him and the thought was only made worse by the fact that he would see Megan while he was away.

“Are you okay?” he kissed her forehead and stroked her cheek, “You’re quiet all of the sudden.”

“I’m fine, just thinking” she gave a smile, the smile he knew meant she had something on her mind.

“What is it Livvie?” he asked continuing to stroke her cheek.

“Just thinking about you going to New York” she kissed his shirt lightly, “I’ll miss you. I’ll be lonely.”

“I’ll be lonely without you too”

“You won’t miss me” she pouted playfully, “You’ll be so busy with the girls and…” her voice trailed off. She couldn’t say Megan’s name and she couldn’t even bring herself to say the word ‘wife’.

“I will miss you” he insisted with a kiss to her pouty lips, “and I talked to Megan today and the plan is to tell the girls over the break.”

“Okay” her voice sounded more confident.

            Fitz knew that his marriage was a tough subject for Olivia as it was for him. But he didn’t want it to overshadow everything about their relationship. He hoped that having a concrete plan would ease both of their minds.

“There is one room you didn’t show me Livvie” he nuzzled her neck.

“The master bathroom?” she flirted.

“Welcome back Livvie” he grinned, “Now show me where your bedroom is”

            She giggled and took off up the stairs surprised to find that he didn’t follow directly after her.

“Fitz” she called from the top of the stairs.

“Be right there” he called back, picking up the gift he’d brought and carrying it with him.

“So this is the bedroom” she smiled. He observed the room, it was 100% Olivia Pope, everything was perfection from the fresh flowers to the down duvet and muted gray walls. There was not a thing out of place and he realized that was the source of her anxiety. Her life was perfect and compartmentalized and orderly except him, except their relationship. This was a huge step for her, to let go of her control and just be with him.

“Fitz, are you okay?” she touched the back of his shoulder.

“I’m great” he turned to look into her eyes and she thought she saw tears welling there, “Livvie, it means a lot to me that you invited me here.”

“You mean a lot to me” she ran her nails along the back of his neck and into his curls.

            He let his fingers wander along her sides dipping under her sweater to feel her soft skin, “We have an early morning, I better get you to bed” he murmured near her ear.  Then it was a blur of sweaters and pants and underwear and sheets until they were together on her bed.

            Fitz started at Olivia’s fingers trailing kisses down her arm to her shoulder. He stopped at her collarbone momentarily and smiled.

“My mom saw that” she giggled. He kissed it lightly then traced his tongue across it.

“And how did you explain it to Mom?” he kissed along her jaw, “Did you tell her you’re dating someone?”

“I told her a box of Christmas decorations fell on me” she barely got the words out before the laughter started. They both giggled as they looked into one another’s eyes and ran their fingers through each other’s hair.

“I wasn’t aware your mother was born yesterday” Fitz’s laughter continued. It was such a carefree sound, she thought. He had a fantastic laugh, warm and sexy, comfortable.

“You can’t do that again” she tried to sound stern.

“Sorry, I guess I  got carried away” he ran his fingers over it again.

“You didn’t let me finish” she pushed Fitz onto his back and moved to straddle him, “What I was saying was that you can’t do that again….where anyone can see it.”

            Fitz liked when Olivia was aggressive and forward, he liked to relinquish control to her. He trusted her implicitly.

“Fair enough” his hands roamed up her thighs and along her abdomen. She instinctively pressed into his strong hands, closing her eyes to appreciate the sensation.  She bent to touch her lips to his. The tease of her tongue along his lips sent a fire coursing through him. He gripped her hair in his left hand his right arm pressing her body against him, his hand cupping her ass. She relished the fact that he could control her small frame so easily with his muscular arms. He released her just long enough to align his hard cock with her moist heat, gripping her tightly again and guiding her down onto him.

“Oh Fitz” she purred into his mouth.

“Livvie” his hands gripped her tighter, pulled her harder. She watched his face as she stroked faster and faster onto him. He watched as every thrust hit the perfect spot, watched her ecstasy build above him. If it was possible she was more perfect in this moment than he had ever seen her. No walls, no façade, just Olivia. And he was just Fitz, not playing husband or father or playboy or heir to a fortune. They were just two absolutely bare souls tangling together, finding one another, finding what was important and meaningful.

            She felt herself losing control and could see the last of Fitz’s resolution fade when she swiveled her hips guaranteeing he wouldn’t last long. She felt his fingers press into her skin when his hands gripped her hips, the familiar pain a welcome sensation. Then her eyes fell closed as she felt the sensation building from her toes. It sped through her like a thousand bolts of lightning until she shuddered above him coaxing him to follow her over the edge.

            He gathered the covers and brought them up close around them. She put her head on his chest and they played out what was quickly becoming a routine. Whispering and laughing and caressing and kissing. He decided the present could wait until morning. He didn’t want to do anything to disrupt this dance of theirs.